[1] News from Absurdistan - Are You a Good Christian?

To overcome the dearth of left-wing parties that do actually profess to be left-wing, a new party has constituted itself in Germany: "the left" headed by a certain Herr Oskar Lafontaine. In his inaugural speech Herr Lafontaine pronounced that "a socialist does not have to be a Christian. But a Christian must be a socialist." Now, that leaves some Christians with a problem, for how are they to know whether they are Christians, or more fundamentally: socialists. Who is a pseudo-Christian scoundrel and who is a sound Christian? These and many more pressing questions will be finally addressed and exhaustively resolved by a new force in the country.